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Twist on Orman’s Parent Trap

25 September 2006 1,474 views 3 Comments

Crazy Parents. A Drain?Suze Orman’s latest Yahoo article titled The Parent Trap addresses the issues Boomers are facing with grown kids moving back in, as well as aging parents. I see another problem here, my own personal parent trap. Let me esplain…

My parents were crazy youngsters when hey had me, divorced when I was two, and then those crazy fools married again when I was in my late teens. Each had more children, and one parent even gained a whole other family. I have been on my own ever since.

My dilemma looks like this:
Aging parents, although they are in denial of that (my dad didn’t want to be called grandpa at first- probably had something to do with the fact he had a 3 and 8 year old himself!); they may not be quite ready for retirement themselves (dad much better than mom); they are still raising kids; if something happens to either of them, as their only child and the only one over 18, I will be the one to step in and care for them, make the tough decisions, and raise their kids (god forbid it come to that!). All this in addition to making my own way with two little guys.

I have my parents and siblings built into my long term plan, but for now, I have to focus on getting myself financially set. The proverbial oxygen mask has to go on me and my kids before I can attend to anyone else’s financial needs. (Ya heard?) Have you thought about how your family fits into your financial plan?

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3 Comments »

  • Jason said:

    Erin, welcome to InvestorGeeks.

    I too have been thinking more about how my family fits into my financial life.

    One catalyst for this is Kim and my wedding. My parents are divorced, with one better off financially than the other. It’s interesting working out how things will be taken care of between us (and Kim’s parents too). I’m an independent person, and my initial reaction is to want to pay for everything myself. But it is a large expense, and our parents would be hurt if we didn’t take their help. The trick is how do we take their help without making them feel like they are carrying too much of the burden or embarrassed that they are not contributing as much as other parents?

    Another thing that has happened recently is that my older brother asked me for a small loan. It wasn’t much money, but I’ve seen how he has “borrowed” money from my parents in the past. He’s has a great job with the military, and there is no reason he shouldn’t have enough credit to make the purchase he wanted to lend money from me for. I’m visiting the bro in a couple weeks and plan to take advantage of our time to knock some fiscal responsibility into him.

    # 25 September 2006 at 11:16 pm
  • prlinkbiz said:

    Thanks Jason! I hear you about putting responsibility where it belongs-. It’s good that you know that heading into marriage!

    # 27 September 2006 at 12:39 pm
  • Thomas said:

    Erin, good article. Jason, wedding costs….Ahh…..We had a small wedding but both my wife and I like to do things right. This usually always means expensive. I think I single handedly helped the store Michael’s reach their earnings expectations in 2003. Every other day it was a “just one more thing” trip to the local Michael’s. I would have to say it is all worth it though. Go big on everything and people will never stop talking about it. We had prime rib and my uncle still says it was the best he ever ate.

    Also pay for a professional DVD. A friend of mine who worked in Hollywood for a while put ours together. Incredible. He even make a music video from snippets of the big day. Let me know if you want his contact info. He teaches high school in Wisconsin now.

    # 29 September 2006 at 3:28 pm